When Heart Attacks

What is love?

You can find so many definitions of love,

But I can't seem to settle for one.

We met through an university orientation.

We quickly grew close to each other,

Since we attended the same course.

But it was half a year later,

Only I discovered all along you had a lover.

There was a definite spark between us.

But we could not share a love divine.

Throughout the wonderful year,

I was deeply moved again and again.

How you phone every time you were troubled,

I was there to listen your academic and love problems.

How you delivered my favourite hazelnut hot chocolate,

Whenever you visited my place.

How you rushed to Selfridges,

To purchase the exact mouse mat you had when I lost mine.

How you accompanied my grocery shopping chore,

Insisted to devour those my unappetizing cooked food.

How you breezed to my place,

And took me away from harassment of a junior.

How you hold my hand,

As if you would never let it go again.

The list can go on and on,

But my heart aches more.

Was it love?

I did not figure out then.

I am sorry,

For I denied you in front of friends,

For I held back,

For I considered you as not an ideal candidate.

I am truly sorry.

We shared one unromantic valentine's day.

For today, I wish you a happy valentine's day.